THE UGLY TRUTH ABOUT WORKING MOTHER’S SACRIFICE

“Be the kind of mom who makes other moms want to be on your team”

I thought the start after maternity leave would be just rough, and that the lack of sleep and fatigue would quickly disappear. Unfortunately, after six months in a new job, it’s just as difficult. I’m mentally stronger than I was in the first few weeks, and I’m already well organized. But the forgetfulness that never existed before pregnancy has increased to a level I hate, and I still don’t have enough time for everything.

Below is a survival list for working mothers, based on my experience.

FIRST

Prepare everyone at work for the fact that you have children, even small children. Most women in the Czech Republic (we’ve lived here with my family for four years), aged 40 and older, already have teenagers at home, not, like me, 6- and 3-year-olds. In England, my bosses and friends were similar in age to me and had children a year or two older or younger than mine. This had a huge impact on the positive atmosphere at work, as we shared similar experiences. At my current job, everyone is surprised that I have such young children and work. My husband works too, and yet we manage to juggle it all.

SECOND

Turn off your brain to the comments: she’s off again, she took three days off again, she finishes early again. Only you know that as a mom, you no longer only come to work when your child is sick; you leave early because the school calls, etc. My husband and I share the absences from work equally when our children are sick. We do everything we can to avoid missing more than three days of work. The worst is when the virus spreads from the child to the parents. In my experience, children feel better after the first day of illness. After a few more days, they’re jumping on the beds. While we – parents with the same virus- can barely stand after three days.

THIRD

You don’t choose your boss, but if he has children, he’s on your side. If your boss is a woman, it’s double the fun. This formula worked for me in my first job. It’s a completely different experience than now – in my second job. Moms work with Moms; they’re exhausted, but happy with the work, the conversations, and the coffee we share. When my children were sick, my boss covered for me, and when her children were sick, I came to work in her place. https://littlepuzzlesandme.com/my-new-look-on-mom-returning-to-work-after-maternity/

FOURTH

It’s much easier and more enjoyable to work in a cohesive team, even if we have different lifestyles—single people and married people, childless people and those with children—we can always reach an understanding. Some people are simply stuck in their comfort zone, while everyone else, with new life experiences, is their enemy.

FIFTH

The most pathetic thing about my job was that the group of childless people working with me, made working mothers feel guilty. For example, when they told me I would have known how to do this if I hadn’t missed a training session on the topic yesterday. Instead of giving me the information from that training and explaining it to them, just as I explain it to those who missed it, they left me behind.

I find the current divide between Working Mothers and the Childless Team awkward. I always catch up and don’t take time off to rest or neglect a work project just because I’m a mom. I also fulfill my duties as a mother outside of work. Employees who aren’t in this situation shouldn’t comment on mothers’ work.

Summary of maternal difficulties

Overall, I admire mothers’ decision to return to work. We work eight hours a day, picking up the kids from school, making them food, putting them to bed, and getting up in the middle of the night when they cry. I try my best to separate work from family. I fulfill my responsibilities at work, but also those at home.

I’m grateful to all the moms who are returning to work because I’m not alone. I feel more supported and protected by working moms.