MORE TRUE FACES, LESS FAKE SMILES.

“I don’t care about fake boobs, but I’m fed up with a fake smile”.

If someone has known me for a while, right after the title, they will know what I put in today’s post. But for new readers and new future friends, I will describe some examples from my life. I’ll show you how people I knew hide their emotions, and what’s worse, instead of bad emotions they use a fake smile and say: “I’m okay”, “I feel great” or “You know me: same old, same old.” Replacing bad emotions with sweet, fake feelings, false smiles, and unreal conversation, we called with friends: “Vomit the rainbow”.

For one reason I understand fakeness around. We don’t trust all people and perhaps we only show our true face to our family, at home, or in our peaceful zone. I present myself as such a person. I’m not open, and it takes me a long time to speak from my heart. And here probably my old friends are laughing that “I’m a cold bitch”, heartless. That’s what everyone thinks when they meet me for the first time. I’m a careful person and to gain my trust is like climbing Mount Everest. I hope that after so many years of relations, my friends have changed my nickname to a more polite one.

Another truth about me I don’t talk too much about myself when I don’t know people, I prefer to listen first. Also, I never turn bad emotions into miraculous ones and fake smiles. But let’s move on to the real examples:

2 years ago in the playground:

“Hi, Marta nice to see you, how are you?”

“Much better today, but last week kids were sick, I spent the whole week with them after I was horribly exhausted and caught a virus too. And you?”

“I’m fine, same old, same old. We are with my husband took a few days off and came without our kids for coffee.” 

“Wow, I’m jealous, such a great idea.”

“Can you tell my husband that I went to the toilet?”

“Yes of course.”

After 2 seconds:

“Hi, Marta.”

“Hi, Robert. Lucie is in the toilet. How are you?”

“Quite well. The shit week has passed. Today Lucie and I have a day without children, after all the stress with the hospital, we had to breathe. Lucie probably already mentioned it.”

“I’m afraid she hasn’t had the opportunity yet”.

“Okay then let me tell you. Michael ate a little Lego and we spent a crazy time in the hospital waiting to see if he would poop with that Lego inside or need to operate”.

“Sounds horrible.”

“Yes, but only for the parents, Mike was glad that everyone ran around him and controls his poop. He watched fairy tales and drank something for purging. When the block fell out, Mike was even unhappy with the end of fairy tales and we went home. Of course, Lucie blamed herself. I’m surprised she didn’t tell you.”

On the way home, I was tormented by questions: why, why, what for? Until evening, I couldn’t accept why Lucy had hidden everything under false conversation and a smile. After 4 years of acquaintance, children play together from an early age and go to the same nurseries. You know how hard it was for me to meet her the next time, I had a feeling that she was telling the truth this time.

And here I have to thank all men very much for just talking about the problems. My husband always says: “Talk to me simply.” Men love – they show it, they are tired – they show too, they have a hard day at work – they talk about it. This is not the first time I see men who don’t hide their emotions and say what the truth looks like. Unlike women who hide everything from other women or just lie.

Story from my life:

“Hi, Marta, are you ready to start your shift?

“Not Rachel, I had a bad message from home. My dad is in hospital after a heart attack. Doctors say his condition is stable and we don’t have to go to the hospital, but I still have terrible stress.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that. Everything will be fine. But you know how they say it, “Don’t bring emotions to work”, so if you could work with a smile today, it would be great.”

A false smile is not for me. Some people know how to use it every day, but not me. People aren’t stupid. After a few conversations with me, they recognized that I was hiding something. It was hard to end my shift and continue all the conversations with a sweet, not real smile, but I did it.

The situation in my job:

“Hi Clara, how are you today?”

“Hi, Marta, I’m great, waiting for the family. I haven’t seen them for ages. They couldn’t fly because of covid. So I’m so excited.”

“Good to hear this Clara.”

“And you Marta? How is your pregnancy going?”

“Keep your fingers crossed, so far so easy.” 

“Amazing. How many months?” 

“Two left”.

“Wow, maybe you should finish work.”

“To be honest I am less busy here than at home with two boys, my husband, and my son.” 

“That’s I truly understand.”  

That was a nice conversation, right? Simple, positive, usual talking. I’ve always felt kindness and openness from this person. Her smile is pure and sincere.

I’ve given two examples of hiding emotions, mine and Lucy’s. Two examples of using a false face and how difficult it was. Only Clara showed that she is who she is and that her true feelings have triumphed in our lying world.
That’s why I try to be honest with myself at work, at home, and in the playground. With friends, family, and children. https://littlepuzzlesandme.com/my-new-face/
My life is then much easier, more positive, and more colorful. And most of all, stay away from the “vomit rainbow” label.