I WISH TO BE MY CHILDREN’S SHADOW

“Magnificent childhood is not childhood locked in a safe bubble.”

Last time we did a little experiment with my kids. From time to time, we try to send our children outside alone and watch them from the balcony. They really like to be independent, especially my 6-year-old son and I’m just afraid to leave them alone. They push me, more and more often, to give them freedom outside. Then I have to prepare one and the same protective story for their safety:

“Children, what will happen and what to do if a stranger comes and asks you to go with him to the car, bus, or restaurant?“

Children answer:

“We won’t go and we will scream for help or call for Mom or Dad, otherwise we’ll just scream.”

“Well done! What if a stranger wants to share candy, lollipops, or ice cream with you in his car?”

Dorota answered too quickly:

“We say thank you.”

After this answer, all the training to protect my children failed.

But I’m surprised I’m such a scared mother, and not only me. Very often, among my mom-friends, topics arise about how to protect, care for, and ensure the safety of our children. During such conversations, we often return to our childhood. The stories we hear and share with the mothers group give me chills. At the same time, I admire that my parents did not feel afraid, leaving me and three siblings in the bosom of mountain nature and cold mountain streams. I still remember how, as little children, we played alone for hours and no one was in danger. Everyone cared about the well-being of the little ones and took care of each other.

Of course, not only me but also the neighborhood kids had such freedom in the forest. Entire groups had fun from morning to evening, and parents did not feel the need to control as I do now.
I know that there are different times and different dangers, but in these times children are born. And they deserve freedom and fun just like we do. I miss the freedom that childhood gave me. The freedom and independence we had no longer exist in this generation. I don’t want to limit my children and follow them step by step, but I’m just afraid for them.
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I see a certain independence and self-reliance in them when we are not with them. I like this feeling. For a moment I forget that I have to keep an eye on them. I forget also about “stranger danger” training for a moment.

I just want to give them the freedom they deserve. Fun and the opportunity to feel independent, but at the same time I’m afraid to leave them alone. I would like to be their shadow forever.